It is midnight. And Im awake. Normally, this would be uhh...normal. However, tonight it isn’t normal, because Im tired and until about 5 hours ago, I was feeling inspired about tomorrow (starting my new diet/exercise plan) and whenever I am inspired about the next morning, I tend to fall asleep much easier.
I have not even begun my weight loss journey officially, and I am already failing! This is not acceptable :(
You see, I have been doing decently all day, thinking to myself "I am not going to go hog wild on junk food just because I am starting a new plan tomorrow. I need to practice self control". But we all know that the more we obsess, the more we...obsess! Oh the redundancy of this post.
So, I know you see where this is going right? I was doing alright, until I accidently had 2 quesadillas this afternoon...but I thought, "NO GENEE! You will not keep going with this, you will shake it off and keep looking forward to tomorrow's plan, and two lil quesadillas will not throw you off this wagon prematurely"...but then, after visiting my grandma, I got home to my boyfriend, Derrick, Saying he wants to make one of my FAVORITE comfort foods (although not listed on my previous post as a Fave, it is an OLD fave from childhood!)....Mac and cheese. And Derrick is a big eater, although not a particularly big fella (lucky guy has a great metabolism), so he made ALOT of Mac and cheese, 3 boxes to be exact. I must have eaten at least one box all by itself.
Now I feel like CRAP...physically and mentally! I cannot sleep, and I know that day 1 back on that elliptical is going to be sooo much harder because of the way I fed myself today!
Does anyone els do this? Binge eat the day before you go on a diet/meal plan (whatever you want to call it)? I really thought this time would be different. And I am hoping it still will be. I got to do something different. And I do have ALOT of stress and dissatisfaction in other parts of my life right now, so I know that emotional eating is allot of what I will be battling, so I will take a tip from bitchcakes, and try to modify my behavior, and find other things to replace those warm fuzzy feelings food gives me when I am feeling particularly vulnerable... I highly recommend reading her post, I really enjoyed it.
So I know I promised pictures, and a bit more about myself, but you see that wasn’t supposed to be until tomorrow (well since it is after midnight, I guess you could say, not till later today! Ha!), so gotta wait till then! Its ok, I know I don’t have followers any ways lol! But I can pretend ;) I am still getting use to this online community though, and figure it will all come to me some day as to how to utilize everything to my full advantage. But really, I love BlogSpot already and don’t know what took me so long to get on here and read everyone’s wonderful blogs and ramblings. I already have some favorites I look forward to.
Well now that I got that food binge catastrophe off my chest, I will resist posting a pic of a big bowl of macaroni and cheese, and try to head back to bed.... after reading through a couple more blogs and stopping by youtube of course! haha
until later today (tomorrow?)...
xoxo! Genee'
I have not even begun my weight loss journey officially, and I am already failing! This is not acceptable :(
You see, I have been doing decently all day, thinking to myself "I am not going to go hog wild on junk food just because I am starting a new plan tomorrow. I need to practice self control". But we all know that the more we obsess, the more we...obsess! Oh the redundancy of this post.
So, I know you see where this is going right? I was doing alright, until I accidently had 2 quesadillas this afternoon...but I thought, "NO GENEE! You will not keep going with this, you will shake it off and keep looking forward to tomorrow's plan, and two lil quesadillas will not throw you off this wagon prematurely"...but then, after visiting my grandma, I got home to my boyfriend, Derrick, Saying he wants to make one of my FAVORITE comfort foods (although not listed on my previous post as a Fave, it is an OLD fave from childhood!)....Mac and cheese. And Derrick is a big eater, although not a particularly big fella (lucky guy has a great metabolism), so he made ALOT of Mac and cheese, 3 boxes to be exact. I must have eaten at least one box all by itself.
Now I feel like CRAP...physically and mentally! I cannot sleep, and I know that day 1 back on that elliptical is going to be sooo much harder because of the way I fed myself today!
Does anyone els do this? Binge eat the day before you go on a diet/meal plan (whatever you want to call it)? I really thought this time would be different. And I am hoping it still will be. I got to do something different. And I do have ALOT of stress and dissatisfaction in other parts of my life right now, so I know that emotional eating is allot of what I will be battling, so I will take a tip from bitchcakes, and try to modify my behavior, and find other things to replace those warm fuzzy feelings food gives me when I am feeling particularly vulnerable... I highly recommend reading her post, I really enjoyed it.
So I know I promised pictures, and a bit more about myself, but you see that wasn’t supposed to be until tomorrow (well since it is after midnight, I guess you could say, not till later today! Ha!), so gotta wait till then! Its ok, I know I don’t have followers any ways lol! But I can pretend ;) I am still getting use to this online community though, and figure it will all come to me some day as to how to utilize everything to my full advantage. But really, I love BlogSpot already and don’t know what took me so long to get on here and read everyone’s wonderful blogs and ramblings. I already have some favorites I look forward to.
Well now that I got that food binge catastrophe off my chest, I will resist posting a pic of a big bowl of macaroni and cheese, and try to head back to bed.... after reading through a couple more blogs and stopping by youtube of course! haha
until later today (tomorrow?)...
xoxo! Genee'
Something that has helped me a lot in the past few weeks is realizing that there will always (barring a catastrophe) be more food to eat. The cookie I am eating will not be the last cookie I ever eat. You will be able to eat quesadillas again. So there is no need to over-do it.
ReplyDeleteThis is easy to say, harder to do. (I grew up in a family that didn't believe in leaving food on the plate...and brownies only lasted about 16 hours, so you had to get your bites in when you could!)
And one more thing: You are not FAILING! You are a human being, and you fail and SUCCEED all the time. SO don't stress it:) HAve fun on the elliptical!
It is ok. Look at the big picure..take it one week at a time. If you have too many calories one day, you can make up for it the next.
ReplyDeleteThe other thing I like to do is look at how many calories something has then figure out how many minutes of running it would take to burn it off. I then (usually) decide it is not worth it.
Be sure to do your weigh in tomorrow morning...that box of mac n cheese will bump you up a bit higher, I bet...so, your week 1 results will be that much more fabulous when you stick to it, eat well, and exercise. :) Cheering you on!
Geenee, I know exactly what you're going through. Try not to beat yourself up over the mac and cheese. Everyone in my family eats differently than I do and it's a challenge not to succumb to the cookies and hamburgers they leave in plain sight. Sometimes, I cave, but most times, I win and I'm able to resist those foods. Usually, I stock my refrigerator with options... fixins for making a healthy pizza. I've just decided that there are some foods that I love to eat--like quesadillas so I've learned to make them with shrimp, lots of red salsa, and just an ounce of cheese.
ReplyDeleteYou're going to have this "hiccups" (that's what I like to call them) but guess what? with each meal, there's a new opportunity to make a better choice. Try not to lose sleep over it. Take it one meal at a time. Sorry my comment is so long. I just can really identify with you. I found your website through bitchcakes site.
I think that its normal to have a binge before Diet Day 1..I have done it before every diet I ever started. Whats more important though is that you get to Day 1 and then 2 and 10 and 45 and....you see where I am going with this right? Repeat after me: "I can do this and I will do this because I DESERVE this!!"
ReplyDeleteGood luck and keep us posted!
I think you need to get back here to Blogland and get started, Chickie Poo! Whaddya say?
ReplyDeleteYes!!! I actually plan out all the crap that I'm going to eat the night before I start trying to lose weight. Sad, right? So don't worry about it, you'll jump on the bandwagon tomorrow!
ReplyDeleteDon't stress it, just take it one day at a time. thats what i do. ive tried everything under the sun to lose weight, and n ow im doing the most extreme thing ive ever done, with the whole 500 calories or less a day diet, and its the focus on one day at a time that helps me through it. i know im going for 200 days straight, but i dont think about all those days...i just think about the day im on, and perhaps reflect on the days ive already completed...and the more days you complete, the more momentum builds in my favor...its positive and thats what i try to do. and honestly, i dont think there is anything wrong with eating one last "bad" meal before you start a diet, offically. just no that its the end of that chapter in your life. Good luck and i look forward to seeing you succeed:)
ReplyDeleteWhats done is done! You can totally do it. Take it one day at a time - don't think about the long term - it will be much easier. Good luck!
ReplyDelete